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Vampire Menace
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Martin



Joined: 21 Apr 2001
Posts: 134
Location: Toronto,Ontario,Canada

 PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2001 6:53 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

Martin:NOT AGAIN!!! Well, at least I can fight with Talespinner again.

Talespinner:Sounds like Martin is here.*walked to Martin*

Martin:Hi Talespinner, what's up?

Talespinner:Some evil magic user have been raising Vampires. See, there is one about to attack me. WHAT, A VAMPIRE ATTACKING ME!!!!!

Martin:No problem. *Cast ninjasu of ground, HUGE spices raised from the ground and Killed the vampire*

Talespinner:you are COOL. Can I learn you Magics?

Martin:It's Called NINJASU! I'll teach you when we finish our battle. Where is DeVair and archmage and Loralty?

Archmage:I belive I need help killing vampire armies.

Martin:No problem!*Cast ninjasu of fire dragons, 4 Burning Chinese dragon came out of nowhere*

Archmage:I'm getting jelous!

Martin:*finishing the last vampire with his sword*I don't care.

------------------
...
 
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Falotar



Joined: 22 Jan 2001
Posts: 2579
Location: Yaro'on the Fair

 PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2001 9:22 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

The house of Loralty. There is a bookcase, with the Complete Histories of Forumia- by Falotar- filling it completely. Loralty sits at a small writing table, composing a Report on the Expense of Silk for the Robes of Monks. He hears a hissing sound.
Loralty: What is that? *The door is ripped off its hinges. A vampire shuffles in, accompanied by two skeletons and a zombie*.
Vampire: We are commandeering your home for the United Undead Nations. Please step outside with Corporal Bones. *gestures at a skeleton*
Loralty: I will do no such thing! *smashes the skeleton with a critical hit.*
Vampire: Corporal! *crying* How could you hurt my poor Bones?
Loralty: I will hurt you if you do not leave. Immediatly!
Vampire: Bleh! Will you? Men! At him! *skeleton and zombie lurch toward Loralty. Vampire puts Corporal Bones back together*
C.B.: Leave we shall, Captain?
Vampire: Yes!*glares at Loralty, who just dispatched the two undead* You'll pay for your insolence.
Loralty: Get out, you walking corpse! *Vampire shuffles out. Loralt spots TaleSpinner, Archmage and Martin. Marching out of the door, shoving the vampire and Corporal Bones out of the way, he walks to meet them.*
 
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Jack deVair



Joined: 22 Dec 2000
Posts: 69

 PostPosted: Thu May 17, 2001 10:59 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

As Loralty joins with the other adventurers the story shifts to a two story tall building built is an odd combination of Elven and Dwarven styles. It is quite apparent that it has many more skylights that were originally designed. In front of the building there is a sign saying: Jack deVair's Alchemical Emporium, Look for our products at the Magic Bazaar!

*The veiw centers on a tall man standing in front of a table full of alchemical equipment. He is carefully mixing a orange substance*

deVair: Just a little bit more and it will be just right. There, thats the last of it.

*He pours the substance into a flask, which he then seals and places into one of many holders sown into the lining of a greatcloak. deVair then dons the cloak and fetches his hat. Just as he places his hat on his head he hears a many traps springing, causing much distress to whoever set them off, then there is silence save for the sound of footsteps approaching the door to the room. The door busts open, spewing Zombies and Skeletons, led by a vampire, into the room*

Dargtov the Vampire: Alright deVair you will....... WHERE THE BAZES DID HE GO?!?!

Skeleton #2: Uh, Sir what's Dis?

*Skeleton #2 holds out a large beaker, which contains a black liquid, with a fuse leading to it, which is lit.*

Dargtov the Vampire: mommy!

*The veiw switches onces more. We see Jack deVair running with all his might down the street. Behind him we see his Laboratory, an architectural marvel, suddeny blossom into a tremendous explosion, which lifts deVair from his feet and launches him clear across the city where he collides into a group of four people: TaleSpinner, Martin, Loralty, and The Archmage.
 
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The Archmage



Joined: 06 Nov 2000
Posts: 1822
Location: Wakarusa, IN; USA

 PostPosted: Fri May 18, 2001 6:26 am    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

The Archmage: Welcome, deVair! Hears the explosion... What was that?

deVair: My (gasp) lab! Vampires (gasp) are taking over the city (cough)!

Talespinner: Yes, we know. We'd be in trouble right now if it wasn't for Martin.

The Archmage: We have to somehow stop these Vampires. Magic, maybe...?

LOUD VOICE: THEY'VE GOT MAGIC MIRROR, YOU DUNCE.

The Archmage: No, that wouldn't work... They have Magic Mirror...

LOUD VOICE: (SIGH)

The Archmage:We can't keep fighting this Vampires all the time. Any ideas?

------------------
"Now where did I put my spellbook?..."
 
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Ericthemajestic



Joined: 06 May 2001
Posts: 65

 PostPosted: Fri May 18, 2001 2:53 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

*A man is talking to a vampire. Half of this man is a skeleton. The other half is green, rotting flesh. They are standing nest to a table with an open book on it.*

Eric The Majestic:*Angrilly* General Bleh! How come our undead aren't killing those heros. Don't I give them enough heros?

General Bleh:*cowardly* They're too powerful.

Eric The Majestic: Then build an ancient castle in an unexplored area. That'll help them.

General Bleh: I'll get on it right away sir.
*General Bleh bows and exits. The view goes over to desk onto book. Book is showing an open field.*

Eric The Majestic: Now let's see what those pesky heros are up to.

*Book's picture changes to showing Talespinner, Martin, Loralty, Archmage, and deVair
 
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Martin



Joined: 21 Apr 2001
Posts: 134
Location: Toronto,Ontario,Canada

 PostPosted: Sat May 19, 2001 12:23 am    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

Martin:I've got something good for all magic users in the traveling group. *got out 30 sherikens* I will teach you how to use this weapon.

LOUD VOICE:GOOD.

Martin:*teaching every body how to use sherikens* Like it?

Archmage:Greeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeat!

Talespinner:COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

Devair:It's incredable!

Martin:Let's go!

Talespinner:But where?

Martin:I heard something over there! It must be a monster army!

Talespinner:I'll take all of them with my super stike!

Martin:Stop talking and start fighting!!!

*In the dark castle of Eric*

Eric:Who is the guy in white and red armor?

Vampire scout:He took down a huge army of our elite vampire warriors in one magic!!!

Eric:WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IMPOSSIBLE, HE IS SOME ONE I LIKE TO SEE! BRING BACK HIS BODY!

*Back to our heroes*

Martin:*killing vampires with his sword and ninjasu, a vampire scout used his best magic and hit him on his head* STAND BACK! BOOM!!!*He self destructed* Feel much more better.

Talespinner:Are you OK?

Martin:Yep,I am refreshed on the head.

Archmage:This stars are great!!!

DeVair:Yeah.

Loralty:COOL!

Martin:They are called "Sherekens"!

Eric:IMPOSSABLE!!!

------------------
...
 
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Martin



Joined: 21 Apr 2001
Posts: 134
Location: Toronto,Ontario,Canada

 PostPosted: Sat May 19, 2001 11:54 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

Martin:Where did I put my sword?

Talespinner:Is that your sword you are standing on?

Martin:Oh yeah, thanks.

Talespinner:Let's celebrate by going to the best inn in the whole kingdom and eat the best meal and drink the best wine!

Martin:I don't drink wine! I'm only ten!

Archmage:It's OK, I can get you some orange juice.

Martin:thanks.

Loralty:Fine with me.

DeVair :Don't leave me alone!

------------------
...

[This message has been edited by Martin (edited 19 May 2001).]
 
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Martin



Joined: 21 Apr 2001
Posts: 134
Location: Toronto,Ontario,Canada

 PostPosted: Sun May 20, 2001 2:17 am    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

*In Eric's castle*

Eric:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Even with magic mirror spell, we cannot block his magic!

Vampire spy:Master, his magics are not normal spells! They are ninjasus!

Erik:I'll get you!

*In the feast*

Martin:This is great!

Archmage:Told ya.

------------------
...
 
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Martin



Joined: 21 Apr 2001
Posts: 134
Location: Toronto,Ontario,Canada

 PostPosted: Sun May 20, 2001 1:39 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

Martin:Almost forgot, look at me.*Cast ninjasu of Fried snails*Got some thing tasty myself.

Talespinner:We don't have to worry about food on our way now.

Elite Vampire Commander: Get that man in red and white armor, NOW.

Loralty:YOU FEAST RUINERS!*punched a vampire in the face*

Martin:Let me do the job*Cast ninjasu of razor Leafs* Take that you vampires!*100 grave stones appered in front of them*

Archmage:I am really jelous now!

Martin:What ever.
 
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Ericthemajestic



Joined: 06 May 2001
Posts: 65

 PostPosted: Sun May 20, 2001 5:44 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

*Eric The Majestic's castle.*

Eric: General Bleh! Send hordes of skeletons and zombies to collect taxes from the townsfolk.

General Bleh: Sir!

*20 skeletons walk up to house number 1000. Skeleton knocks on door.*

Skeleton: Open up. It's the tax collectors from Undead Village.

Man:*Openning door.* What [i]Undead Village[i/]?

Skeleton: The one ruled by Eric The Majestic. Pay the taxe of 50 gold or prepare to die.

Man:*Handing over 50 gold.* Here. I'm glad we had some extra from the tax this morning.

Skeleton: *Putting gold in sack.* Okay. Have a nice day.

*Party continues on. Next scene at an inn. Loralty, deVair, Talespinner, Martin, and Archmage walking out of inn and leaving as zombies and skeletons walk into inn.*

Zombie #1: Vivve te wax clober.

Innkeeper: What'd he say?

Skeleton #1: He said give the tax over.

Innkeeper: What for?

Zombie #1: Hin kame lof Kric te Mujastic!

Innkeeper: Huh?

Skeleton #5: Just hand over the tax of 50 gold.

Innkeeper: But I have only 5 gold.

Skeleton #1: Then your place gets burned down.

Innkeeper: What?!

*Zombie #3 takes out 3 fire balms. He throws them against the walls the place goes up in flames. The skeletons and zombies leave locking door behind them. The rogues and peasents stare in horror as the inn starts to burn down.*
 
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Martin



Joined: 21 Apr 2001
Posts: 134
Location: Toronto,Ontario,Canada

 PostPosted: Sun May 20, 2001 10:49 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

Martin:Martin is the hero many times and he is again.*Cast ninjasu of water*

Archmage:*Jelousy turned to 95+*AARRGGHH

Talespinner:What happened to Archmage?

Martin:I think he needs to be alone.

Archmage:I am going to learn some better spells! And they will be Better than ninjasus!!!

Martin:He is jelous.

DeVair:I can give him some potions to change him to normal.

Loralty:Really?

*In Eric's castle*

Eric:What!? Who is that man that is kept on ruining my master plans?

Spy:He is Martin.

Eric:What is his class?

Spy:Ninja.

Eric:Never heard of it.

Spy:He teleported from another world.

Eric:Very well then...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
 
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Falotar



Joined: 22 Jan 2001
Posts: 2579
Location: Yaro'on the Fair

 PostPosted: Sun May 20, 2001 11:51 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

*Loralty stomps away from the group, muttering to himself. He sees a zombie and stops.*
Loralty: Student!
Zombie: W'od?
Loralty: That's not proper pronunciation. Say 'what' PROPERLY!
Zombie: Kilhe kilhe kilhe.
Loralty: THAT'S NOT PROPER! YOU'RE GOING BACK TO SCHOOL! *Grabs zombie and drags it off to a school.*
Archmage: What's the matter with him?
deVair: I think he's drunk.
 
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Martin



Joined: 21 Apr 2001
Posts: 134
Location: Toronto,Ontario,Canada

 PostPosted: Mon May 21, 2001 2:12 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

Martin:He is kinda weird. I smell something dead... THAT IS A ZOMBIE!!!!!!!

Loralty:A ZOMBIE!

Zombie:*Poisoned Loralty and grab him as a hostage*Lrt Matun cale wth is or lour frvnd us DAD!

Martin:*Smiled to the rest of the group*OK, but you have to let him go.*Walked to the zombie*

Zombie:OKY *Let Loralty go*

Martin:*Teleported back to the group* Mastering the ninjasu of displacement does have it's advantages. HEHEHE...

[This message has been edited by Martin (edited 21 May 2001).]
 
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Falotar



Joined: 22 Jan 2001
Posts: 2579
Location: Yaro'on the Fair

 PostPosted: Mon May 21, 2001 10:23 pm    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

*A scene high in a tower of Eric the Majestic's castle. Enter Vampire and Corporal Bones.*
Vampire: Now, Corporal, His Unholiness has assigned the task of ridding Forumia of this Ninja. Any ideas?
Cor. Bones: What is a Ninja?
Vampire:*turns on a gigantic computer, and accesses Database of Hero Classes* No results.
Cor. Bones: Then he's not from Forumia?
Vampire: He is, but his hero class doesn't exist.
Cor. Bones: Isn't that an illegal operation?
Vampire: It is! Aha! We've really got them this time! *Frantically pushes buttons..*
Jay's Office. Jay sits at desk, staring at the computer.
Computer: THIS PROGRAM HAS PERFORMED AN ILLEGAL OPERATION, AND WILL SELF-DESTRUCT IF THE PROBLEM IS NOT CORRECTED IN 6 SECONDS...
Jay: What! NO! Stop!
Computer: PLEASE WAIT WHILE YOUR COMPUTER INITIATES THE SELF-DESTRUCT MECHANISM...
Jay:*Puls out owners manual* There is no self-destruct program.*
Computer: DOWNLOADING SELF-DESTRUCT.EXE FILES...
 
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TaleSpinner



Joined: 08 Sep 2000
Posts: 2018
Location: Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

 PostPosted: Tue May 22, 2001 12:35 am    Post subject: Vampire Menace Reply with quote Back to top

Jay: What the -bleep!-!?!? *frantically presses a few buttons*

*screen goes blank, and then an ominous blue screen appears*

Jay: Uh Oh.

Blue Screen of Death: Windows has detected an illegal operation in the following files:
MARTIN.DLL. Suggested that all instances of 'ninja' be replaced with 'Adept'. Press Enter to Continue.


Jay: *frowns* Oh heck, how bad can that be? *presses Enter*

*back at Ericthemajestic's castle*

Vampire: *grins triumphantly after typing the blue screen of death's error message* It is done! Those heroes are finished now!!

Vampire & Cor. Bones: BWAHaHAaaahahaa!

Cor. Bones: *wipes tears from eye sockets* Oh dear! I almost cracked my ribs laughing! Get it? Ribs!

Vampire & Cor. Bones: BWAHaHAaaaHAhhHaaHAaHaaAHAAhahhhahaahhaaAAAAA!

*maniacal laughter echoes as camera pans out of castle*
 
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